because he is worth it...

My little Parker has been sick for the past couple of days. He's got a cough, fever, won't drink, won't eat...minus the THREE Fruitabu this morning! We've been spending our days on the couch, watching movies. I have no idea how many times Curious George played today! Surprisingly, Parker has had the greatest attitude about being sick this time around. He is super clingy, but I secretly love this. I hope my boys will always want to sit on my lap and snuggle...even when it isn't cool anymore:) Even though he feels really icky, he is still being sweet to me and wants me to comfort him.

I think our relationship is on the mend. Not that it has been terrible, but we've had a few rocky spots since Griffin was born. Since Griffin's arrival, Parker has been waking up from his nap in a nasty mood, usually crying...and just generally sort of ticked off at me much of the time. I get it. I mean, a new baby in the house is a tough thing to handle, especially for a two year old. But I knew that I needed to make some adjustments...

I tried a new approach with Parker this week and it seems to have made a huge difference. First (and this is a total no-brainer), I have been making a huge effort to respond calmly, and even joyfully, rather than react to frustrating situations with Parker. Of course this is going to change the mood in our home! And second, I am trying to show interest in things that Parker is interested in...not just me. In a book I'm reading, the author talks about how it is important to build significant purpose in our child and one of the ways we can do this is by showing them they have our attention...even in the small things. I've always played with Parker, but lately it has been more of me trying to get Parker involved in one of my ideas or asking him to help with Griffin or around the house...because, you know...I'm busy! So now that we have more of a predictable schedule, I have devoted a period of time in our morning to nothing but Parker. This means no phone calls, no cleaning, no folding clothes. Kids know when we're paying attention and I want him to know that I care about what he cares about. During Griffin's morning nap, Parker gets a bath and while I'm drying him off, I ask Parker what he wants to play with. Lately he has wanted to play with the garage. But whatever he wants to play, I totally engage...with sound effects and everything! Little boys are all about the explosion noise:) Anyway, long story short, I want to show Parker daily that he matters, that he has my full attention, and that I want to be involved in the details of his life.

Since I've been making effort in these two areas, Parker has not cried upon waking from his nap and his overall disposition has changed. He's more agreeable, more teachable, more affectionate, and more fun. And I am even finding more joy in the tumultuous two's!

This evening Parker was having a hard time getting to sleep so I crawled into his little bed with him. By the way, I far exceeded the weight limit on that thing...but it didn't matter! I held his hand and he pulled himself up next to me and immediately started to settle down. He decided to place his face right up against mine so that our noses were touching and he breathed right into my mouth for a good 10 minutes! If I am sick in a couple days, I will know where it came from, but those moments are priceless and he's worth it...


Anonymous said...

Hope Parker feels better soon.Can't wait to see the boys this weekend. Have a good week


Jeremy said...

moses loves those fruitabus also! he just gobbles them up- and no added suger to boot!
and i totally know where you are coming from about our kids needing our undivided attention at times. with a new baby in our house we have also been experiences some 'mood swings' (to put it lightly). i am looking forward to lincoln getting in more of a routine so moses can look forward to special time each morning also. great suggestion.
i hope parker feels better soon!!

Tammy said...

Amy, you seem like such a caring and thoughtful mom! I'm sure Parker treasures those moments when it's just the two of you!

Anonymous said...

This post exemplifies the type of mother Amy is to all who read this blog of hers. I watch her every day in amazement and wonder how she can handle so many difficult situations with results that may not show up for a long time. Her job as a mother takes far more patience, tenderness, and strength than mine ever will. These lessons she learns from the growth of our children (and my growth) have made her such a strong, incredible woman of God and I am grateful. Babe, thank you for your passion and grace!


Munchkin Land said...

This is a WONDERFUL reminder about how to best parent our children. It was even a little convicting, ouch! But I thank you! I think it's important to make a concentrated effort to show how much they mean to us and I know I could be making a bigger effort with Devyn. Thanks Amy!

I'm glad that Parker is enjoying his one-on-one time with you. And I hope he's feeling better soon!

Munchkin Land said...

PS That husband of yours is pretty sweet! =) I love that he calls you Babe, often a nickname Jon says to me too!

Joel and Jaime said...

I found your blog a while back through Munchkin Land, but I don't think I've ever commented. But this post was just too sweet! It really shows just how much a loving mama will go through for her children! I pray your relationship with your little guy continues to improve---he really seems like a sweet heart!

Kati said...

Wow Amy...this post sounds all too familiar! It is nice to know that other moms are going through what I've been going through, and that God gives us the patience to make it through each and every day!

I'm hoping that Parker is feeling better, and that your days are continuing to go smoothly!

Aleah said...

I've got stories and lessons I've learned having to do with this same topic. But I don't want to sound like I know it all - because of course I don't!
I'm glad things are going smoothly for you both now! And glad you got some hugs & kisses from Parker while he was sick one of the perks, right?!

AndiMae said...

Amy, you are such an awesome mom! I love this post so much- partly because I could relate to so much of what you wrote, and partly because it really convicted me to make more of an effort to have one-on-one time with Audrey doing things that SHE loves. Speaking of which, she is calling me right now. Gotta go!

Elise said...

Good for you, Mama! It is so encouraging to the rest of us to read these things. It inspires me to focus on really engaging with my boys - thank you!
I hope Parker is feeling better - and that you are still healthy! ;)

Katie said...

I hope your son Parker feels better soon. My son Spencer was sick over memorial day weekend also. I love the cuddle time.

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