|2 year old Parker|
"Your boys are going back to school!"
There was no question in his voice at all...he knows me so well. He knows my heart and how I roll. Ten years of marriage will do that (yay for us!!).
Of course. I have to let go again. This is our third year of starting school and each year I have to give up a little more control. First, pre-k...then kindergarten...and now 1st grade. This time it is all day. SIX hours. Lunch at school. Oh my gosh.
I would love to write a smart post about the beauty of letting go and trusting God with our children. I could. But I would just be talking big. I'm just not there yet. I will be when I need to be, but I'm right in the middle of the process and I just don't have the right kind of words yet. But I can say that I can feel my grip loosening just a bit. Tomorrow will be a big day for me as I have to let go...and maybe just lose it for a while. And then maybe I'll have some pretty words.
I just love them. I sometimes think that the more that I control, the better off they will be. With Parker, I started on day one and was the perfect pregnant lady. I can recall the TWO servings of dessert I ate during my pregnancy...and the handful of days that I DIDN'T work out. I read every book, did everything right. But I very quickly found that it wasn't going to work. Control just is futile. Parenting is a continual exercise of letting go.
And this is just first grade! Geesh!
If I really lose it and leave my KIDS at the grocery store, I'll let you know;)